Cleaning

there's constantly a war going on between my mother and I. she's a neat/cleaning freak and i'm just naturally messy. where she sees an utterly disgusting filthy mess, i don't see anything wrong. so we fight (we live with her).

I wish i was better than i am mentally so i could just become a cleaning machine, i go through spurts of that on and off but i never really stick with it very long because, well....i think cleaning to that degree is pointless and a waste of my life. i'd much rather be on the computer or playing with aiden, or watching tv or reading to just about ANYTHING else.

today everything came to a head...yet again.

we've been fighting all morning and she's finally retreated to her bedroom because she just can't stand the site of me because i don't clean as much as she'd like. so i cleaned- a good amount and throughly. finally got rid of my pile of christmas presents in the living room and picked up all aiden's toys, etc...

now she's acting like everything perfectly okay. she seems to think that as soon as she's done yelling and screaming and calling me horrible names and i'm back on her good side that i'll magically forget all the horrible things she said/called me.

she's always been like that and it drives me insane. I have a severe mental disorder and I can't get away with that i don't understand why she thinks it's okay for her.